In the groove

10/16 I woke up feeling the most sore I have felt. My local anesthetic is empty now. It’s nice to be more aware of my body’s pain and posture and everything. Matthew is home today! He stayed the night with his dad when I was being hospitalized. Then he came home for a quick kiss and to check in and then he spent the entire 3 day weekend at his best friend’s house. I wanted him to be as heavily distracted as possible. I think it was best he came home today after we’ve already gotten a pretty good routine down. I think he would have worried too much and felt powerless those first few days. Today I also got to remove 2 of my tubes myself. Not my drain tubes, but my local anesthetic tubes. These tubes were so much longer than I expected. I felt like a magician doing the never-ending scarf trick. It was painless, just an odd sensation. The only painful part about it was taking off the tape that held it in place. My breasts are a bit less swollen today, still a little bruised. They’re doing great and looking great for being four days post mastectomy. My spacer bag is filled with saline to about a small B cup, I would say, just to keep the skin from growing shut. My doctor’s don’t believe in wrapping so the just taped over the incisions and I’ve been able to watch my breasts heal. It’s interesting. I will get my first saline injection in about 2 weeks to start building them back up to where they were pre-mastectomy. For now I’m just going to take things day by day. Minute by minute really. I can walk around fine but I need help getting in & out of bed. I have to keep my elbows in because it hurts to move them but my arms from my elbows down are totally functional. I’m pretty much just T-Rexing around the house. Everything has been going smoother than I ever could have anticipated. I’m not going to rush myself or push myself harder than I should. I am prone to doing just that. Tim has done a great job of reminding me that he is here to help so I don’t have to pretend like everything is fine if it doesn’t feel fine. I’m learning valuable lessons in love and life here people. 

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